What the hell is going on?! In true HBO fashion, we forget all the bull they put us through at the beginning of the season and we have finally reached an episode that makes our head spin. Thank you, HBO.

Last week I was rooting for Eric because there is no way he is giving up that easy. I will say that he definitely put on a good show for The Authority. Before an incestual bout with his sister he reveals his motive and then has her jump on his brother bits. Meanwhile, Bill has gone insane and keeps seeing Lilith. She tells him she has chosen him to lead them. By the way, side note, her lady area is a focus puller. I feel like it’s uneven or something. Jenna Jamison has to get in there and stencil a fang or something. Anyway, Lilith has also chosen...well, all of The Authority. I’m not sure why she would want them all to kill each other for her sake but it’s working. Perhaps Lilith is not whom she says she is. Dum, dum, duuuuuuuummmmmmmmm!

Sam and Luna are naked again and I actually don’t mind. They have found Emma but yikes, they get caught. Wait, who is that? Oh, Pam is caught to. For what, you might ask?

So, Pam and Tara are walking on thin ice since Tara offed the new sheriff and when our Sharon Osbourne looking Authority vamp comes to Fangtasia to find her progeny she is not happy. She asks who killed him and Pam takes the fall. Silly Pam, we like you and we don’t like Tara. Let her take the fall, Come on!

Before the Fangtasia mess, Jessica tries to get the word to Jason that Russell and Steve Newlin are out and about for a hunt. Bill catches her and when she tries to trick him into thinking that she will “turn” Jason to be with him. Bill freaks and calls her out. He tells her to go do it and sends two guards with her. She meets Jason and gives him a bite but he’s ok because he takes care of those guards and they splat in every direction. Jess then runs off to Fangtasia to hide. Pam says funny and quippy things about hating baby vamps until Jess says she knows where Eric is.

Speaking of baby vamps, there are tons of them now and they are all shitty actors. Thank god most of the ones who attacked Alcide and his dad died by Alcide’s dad’s gun. No more shitty actors.

Onto the fae. Sookie is brought in front of the oldest fairy who apparently works on many planes. I’m thinking some wise woman. No, we get some Beyonce look alike who has really dumb dialogue. The fairies respect her though and she says they will all stand by Sookie to fight Russell. When Russell and Steve Newlin show up to the field where the fairy club is hidden they freak out over the smell. Beyonce fairy puts herself forward and starts to fight but Russell is faster. Yummy yummy yummy I got fairies in my tummy. To add to tummies, Mirella has a bun in the oven. Guess who’s baby it is?

So Eric and Nora are gone, Bill’s officially lost it, Sam, Luna, Pam and Emma are now held captive, Jess is hiding, Tara is still annoying, and the fairies are screwed. Brilliant.

See you next week!